But everyone wants you to be…
When I say “no one is successful,” I don’t mean that nobody achieves anything in life.
What I mean is this:
When we look at people who are older than us — those who have already crossed the stages of life we are going through right now as teenagers or young adults — we often assume they are “successful.”
Why?
Because they have done the things we are trying to do.
They have reached the places we want to reach.
They seem settled, stable, and confident.
So, in our minds, we label them as successful.
But is that always true?
Not really.
It depends.
It varies from person to person.
Let me explain.
How We Define “Success” Without Realizing It
When we see someone who is ahead of us in life, we automatically think:
“They have figured it out.”
“They achieved their goals.”
“They did what they wanted to do.”
But many times, we don’t know their real story.
We don’t know:
- What dreams they had
- What they sacrificed
- What they gave up
- What they regret
- What they couldn’t achieve
We only see the final picture, not the struggles behind it.
And that’s where the confusion begins.
Scenario One: The Dreamer Who Gave Up
Now, think of a person who once had many dreams.
They used to say:
“I will do this.”
“I will do that.”
“I will buy this.”
“I will become that.”
They had ambition.
They had hope.
They had plans.
But when you look at their end result…
Nothing happened.
They stayed exactly where they were.
They didn’t move forward.
They didn’t achieve what they wanted.
They didn’t become who they dreamed of becoming.
Now ask yourself:
What kind of advice will this person give to others?
Will they tell you to dream big?
No.
Most of the time, they won’t.
Instead, they will say:
“Choose a safe path.”
“Don’t take risks.”
“Don’t dream too much.”
“Be practical.”
“Do what is secure.”
Why?
Because they couldn’t achieve their dreams.
And somewhere inside, they start believing:
“If I couldn’t do it, no one can.”
Slowly, they turn into frustrated people who kill others’ dreams — not intentionally, but emotionally.
Instead of motivating, they demoralize.
Instead of supporting, they discourage.
Instead of guiding, they limit.
They were once dreamers themselves.
Now, they stop others from dreaming.
Scenario Two: The Dreamer Who Made It
Now, think of another person.
This person also had many dreams.
They also started from zero.
They also faced problems.
They also failed.
They also struggled.
But they didn’t give up.
They kept going.
And finally, they achieved what they planned.
They built something.
They reached their goals.
They created their own success.
Now, what advice will this person give?
They will say:
“Go for it.”
“Try harder.”
“Believe in yourself.”
“Don’t give up.”
“You can do it.”
Why?
Because they were once in your place.
They know what it feels like to be confused.
They know what it feels like to be scared.
They know what it feels like to doubt yourself.
And because they succeeded, they believe you can too.
They don’t care where you come from.
They don’t care who you are.
They don’t care how small you are right now.
They see potential.
And they push you forward.
So, Why Did I Say “No One Is Successful”?
Now let’s come back to the main line:
“No one is successful.”
What do I mean by this?
In both cases —
Whether the person succeeded or failed —
Both give advice.
Both talk about success.
Both guide you.
But the direction is different.
The Successful One Says:
“Chase your dreams.”
“Follow your plan.”
“Trust yourself.”
Because they did it themselves.
The Unsuccessful One Says:
“Choose safety.”
“Don’t take risks.”
“Lower your expectations.”
Because they couldn’t do it.
So, success is not just about money, position, or stability.
It is about:
Whether someone still believes in dreams.
Whether someone still believes in growth.
Whether someone still believes in the possibility.
Learning to Identify the Right Voices
In life, many people will advise you.
Some will push you forward.
Some will pull you back.
Some will believe in you.
Some will doubt you.
Some will strengthen you.
Some will weaken you.
Your job is not to ignore everyone.
Your job is to understand who is speaking from experience and who is speaking from fear.
Listen to everyone.
Respect everyone.
But follow your own heart.
My Personal Realization
When different people give me different advice, I always try to understand:
Is this person telling me to grow?
Or is this person telling me to stay safe?
Is this person encouraging my dreams?
Or is this person protecting their own regrets?
That makes all the difference.
Final Thoughts
Not everyone who looks successful is truly fulfilled.
Not everyone who advises you knows what is best for you.
Some people want you to succeed.
Some people want you to be safe.
Some people want you to be like them.
But only you know what you really want.
So:
Listen to everyone.
Learn from everyone.
But decide for yourself.
If you’ve read till here, thank you.
Let me know in the comments:
Have you met such people in your life?
Who motivated you?
Who discouraged you?
And according to you, who is truly successful?
I’d love to hear your thoughts.
[IMAGE CREDITS: Photo by Guille Álvarez on Unsplash]
